In order to be in a deeply fulfilling relationship, any relationship, you must be honest, about everything. When you read that do you say to yourself, “There’s no way I could be totally honest and be able to keep my relationship?” A clarification is necessary here. When I say, be totally honest, that doesn’t mean say everything that’s on your mind. It does mean be totally honest with the things that you do say, and the things that need to be said.
The process starts with you now. When you read what I’m saying here, see how it makes you feel. Do you notice that you feel frustrated? Relief? Angry? Hopeless? Excited? Or does this feel like an impossible task? If you’re feeling any of those things, that’s a great start! It’s a great start because that means that you are being honest about how you feel. How does being honest about how you feel impact you? Do you feel more frustrated? Or do you start to feel some relaxation and spaciousness? Whatever is coming up for you, it is perfect for your process.
Over and over I see how couples become more intimate with each other, and each person with themselves, when they are able to be more and more honest about what is going on for them. Being honest deepens the connection, that’s the potential. What’s the point otherwise? If you want to be truly happy, I mean really happy, then you must be honest with yourself and the people you are in relationship with about how you feel.